


A Good Dog With New Tricks

by DawnsEternalLight



Category: Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics)
Genre: Bonding, Damian picks on his siblings, Family, Family Bonding, Family Fluff, Fluff, Gen, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Humor, Sibling Bonding, Tim makes a good seat, Titus is a good dog
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-13
Updated: 2017-06-13
Packaged: 2018-11-13 12:54:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11185542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DawnsEternalLight/pseuds/DawnsEternalLight
Summary: Damian is tired of his siblings attempts at making him 'act his age' and their constant picking on him, so he's concocted the perfect plan to get revenge: Titus. He's absolutely certain that none of his family would ever suspect Titus of anything bad, and with his hands free from any real trouble he'd get away free and clear.





	A Good Dog With New Tricks

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Batfamweek Prompt 2: Shenanigans

Damian locked his eyes with the large, warm, black ones belonging to one of his closest friends. His companion held his gaze patiently waiting for the boy to begin.

“Titus, I must impress upon you the serious nature of this mission.” Damian started, keeping his tone serious, “If I asked anyone else they would surely fall victim to a double cross for a foolish photo of me in a compromising situation.” Damian grimaced thinking of the many times he’d tried to pull a fast one on his siblings only to have his assistant turn on him, “You are the only one I can trust with this, boy. Do you think you can do it?”

Titus blinked and then licked Damian’s cheek, his wet, velvety tongue tickling the boy’s face. Damian resisted the urge to smile and instead nodded his head. “Very well, let’s get started.”

He clipped a small camera to the dog’s collar, black and thin enough to be easily mistaken for hair then stepped back to check his tablet. He could see himself on the screen, albeit from a shorter height.

The two slipped through the manor silently making their way through the halls. They stopped in the hallway outside the foyer. The dog leaned against his side as he stopped, head ducking under Damian’s hand.

He scratched Titus’s ears, hand pressing into the warm soft fur while he peered around the corner. Today would be a bit of revenge for everything, all the unwanted coddling, the surprise photos, and the team ups his many family members often used to get him to ‘act his age’.

The front door rattled for a moment before Damian heard the sound of a key being inserted into the lock. He waited as the lock clicked open and the doorknob began to move again, this time turning unhindered.

“You know what to do.” Damian said and scratched Titus’s left ear twice in quick succession and the dog darted forward at the same time as the door swung open.

“Hey there, Titus .” Jason’s voice was warm as the door clicked shut behind him. “What’s up?”

Damian’s eyes locked on his tablet as he moved away from the foyer. He made his way to the living room as he watched Jason struggling at the front door. He had bags in both hands and was trying to move them all to his left. Titus was making it difficult for him, jumping up and pawing at his chest. Jason managed to hook the extra bags around his arm and reach out to pet Titus.

The dog let him for a moment before jumping back with a happy bark, back stepping a foot or so to allow Jason a few steps into the room before he did it again, jumping forward to beg for attention. Jason chuckled and gave him another good scratch on the head.

“Your pretty demanding today, where’s the Demon Brat?”

Titus’s answer was a lick on the face.

Damian grinned and tucked himself into one of the living room’s lunge chairs. He curled into it, tablet on his lap as he watched.

Titus hounded Jason as the man tried his best to make it to the kitchen, his humor with the dog waning every few steps.

“Come on, stupid dog, enough already.” Jason grumbled, trying to push Titus away from him with his foot. Titus simply moved to the other side and whined.

Suddenly Jason was moving, and Titus was trotting to keep up, above the sound of the headphones in Damian’s ears he heard the booming voice of his second oldest brother, in a tone that only came with irritation.

“Damian! Get your dog under control!”

Shuffling feat, the crackle of plastic bags, and the clatter of nails on wood preceded Jason, followed by Titus. Damian clicked the tablets screen to that of a book he’d been reading and swiped, turning the page.

“Hey! Tater Tot! I’m talking to you.” One of his headphones was yanked from his ears as Jason towered over him.

Damian tilted his head up and frowned at Jason. “What are you talking about, Todd?”

Jason’s hands jerked down towards Titus who wouldn’t stop leaning against this leg. “Your dog’s gone cuckoo.”

“Tt, I doubt that.” Damian rolled his eyes, sitting up. “He’s simply happy to see you. Though why I wouldn’t know. Titus, here.”

The dog waited a beat before pulling himself from Jason’s side and moved close to Damian. He rubbed Titus’s head and smiled up at Jason. “See, completely normal. It’s you who seems to have gone a bit crazy.”

“Been there, done that. It’s not as much fun as it sounds.” Jason shrugged. “Keep your dog under control ok?”

“Whatever.” Damian turned his attention back to his tablet and waited until the sound of Jason’s footsteps faded.

He checked the time on his tablet and grinned. It had taken Titus five minutes less than he’d estimated to break Todd. The dog was good at his job.

“Good boy, take a little break.” Damian told him.

* * *

Damian’s oldest brother was good at a lot of things, being on time was not one of those. Which meant he was very proud of himself when he was. He pranced into the living room and leaned on the back of the chair to look down at Damian.

“Hey, Lil D. How’s it going?”

Damian glanced up from his tablet. “Grayson.” He said by way of greeting, “Don’t you have somewhere to be?”

“Yeah, but I’m running on time for once.” Dick’s smile grew. “Neat right?”

He smirked up at him. “Only if you actually make it on time.”

“I get the hint. Alright, see you later kiddo.” Dick ruffled Damian’s hair and pushed off the back of the chair.

Damian clicked his tongue as if dismissing Dick, but instead giving Titus his next command. The dog looked up from where he’d been resting and Damian nodded towards Dick. With what could only be described as a smile Titus jumped to his feet and hurried after the oldest robin.

He pushed past Dick and plopped down in the middle of the hallway, filling up the somewhat narrow space with his black bulk. Damian watched as Dick’s legs filled the screen in the view of the camera.

“Titus.” The dog’s name was a sigh on Dick’s lips.

Damian’s view shifted to the wall as the dog looked up at him. He heard his brother sigh and he knelt down to pet the dog, giving Titus a good pat before he stood again. “Alright, now scoot.”

Titus stayed firmly planted on the ground so Dick attempted to step over him, but Titus followed Damian’s training pattern perfectly and jumped up, knocking Dick’s foot out of the way. The man stumbled back a step and frowned down at Titus.

“Not funny. Come on move.”

Damian had to hold back a grin as Titus rolled over onto Dick’s feet and the man grumbled something indistinguishable before, “Today of all days.”

Dick leaned down to roll the dog off his feet, Titus jumping to his feet. Damian heard a sighed, _finally_ and both Dick and Titus moved down the hall a foot or so before the dog plopped back to the ground.

The groan from Dick made Damian outright laugh. “Titus, what’s with you?”

Dick stooped to attempt to push Titus down the hall, hands braced against the thick black fur on his side as he shoved. To his shame Titus wouldn’t budge. The dog had locked his claws into the floor and held his ground, pushing back. Dick sighed and fell back to sit across from the dog, hands braced behind him.

They looked at each other for a second, blinking, before Titus leaned forward to nudge Dick’s foot. The man let his arms slip back and he lay back on the floor. “Two can play your game, Titus.” he muttered.

Titus stood and trotted over to him to lick on Dick’s face. He allowed it for a moment before moving to push the dog out of the way. Damian watched as Dick caught sight of his wrist, and the watch on it, his eyes going wide.

“No, aww man.” he jumped up to his feet, rambling and brushing himself off. “One day, I can’t be on time for one lousy day.”

“Hey Dames! Come get your dog! He’s making me late.” Dick called, waited a moment and hurried back to the room, Titus hot on his heels. “I thought you trained him better than to get in the way.”  

Dick motioned down to the dog, and froze, surprise on his face. “Where?” he asked, but Titus had already trotted over to lick at Damian’s hand.

He titled his head back to look at Dick, “Don’t you have somewhere to be?”

“Ah! Now I’m even later!”

* * *

There were nights, rare as they were, when Damian and his family didn’t patrol. Some nights they even found their way to a kind of peace, watching cartoons or low budget horror movies together. Tonight, Damian found himself spending the evening with Tim, Steph, and Jason.

Drake, predictably, had fallen asleep, laid out on the floor of all places. Todd busied himself with a video game. Brown was painting her nails beside Tim. And Damian sat on the couch, across from Jason, sketchbook in hand, with Titus resting at his feet.

Steph poked her unpainted foot in Tim’s direction, toes pressing into his shoulder. “It’s like magic. He stays awake for days and then boom, he’s out. He sleeps like the dead.”

Jason tilted his head towards Tim. “Course he does. He takes after Bruce that way.”

“Father doesn’t sleep like the dead. You should know that, Todd.” Damian muttered into his sketch.

“Ha!” Jason scoffed, “Takes one to know one, kid.”

Damian sat up, setting his sketchbook aside. “Tt. I suggest we test Brown’s theory.”

Jason raised an eyebrow at him, “Oh? What’d you have in mind?”

Steph sat forward and looked from Damian to Tim. “You’re not going to do anything terrible, right? Because after last month’s incident I can’t actually let you do that.”

“Your just scared of Alfred.” Jason said.

“For good reason.”

“Hush both of you. Brown, I am not going to do anything ‘terrible’. And, Todd, be silent or you’ll wake him.” He leaned forward, and whispered a command to Titus. The loss of warmth at his feet was sad, but a good tradeoff for what he knew was going to happen.

 

“Brown, if you have any desire to save this moment for later I suggest getting your phone out.” Damian said, knowing she would, and knowing he could get a copy off her later.

Tim was laying on his back, head propped under one of the pillows from the couch, with a blanket half draped over him by Steph. Titus found a good spot on Tim’s stomach and laid down, covering the boy’s torso, before resting his head on his crossed paws.

Damian pulled out his phone to take a picture and caught Jason doing the same from the corner of his eye. Steph had been recording since his warning, a grin growing on her face every second.

“How long do you think it’ll take for him to wake up?” Jason asked, his voice shaking with restrained laughter.

Damian shrugged, he’d never had Titus lay on someone who was sleeping before, let alone Drake. By his guess it would be the heat that woke his brother and not the added weight. Tim could handle extra weight, and might like it. He had a large collection of weighted blankets after all. It was the warmth that bothered him, Damian knew that his brother would sleep under sheets if he could, hating to be hot while he slept.

“Not long.” Steph said. “He’ll be burning up any minute now.”

Her prediction was right as in the next minute Tim groaned and attempted to roll over. When he couldn’t his eyes snapped open, and he tried to sit up.

“What’s going on?” He asked, voice groggy with sleep. “Why’s it so hot in here?”

One of Tim’s arms was free from Titus, having been tucked under the pillow. He pulled it out and pushed at Titus’s side, and frowned, still not quite understanding.

“Is this? Titus? What’re you doing lying on me?” He shoved again at the dog’s side, before letting his head flop back down onto the pillow. His eyes caught sight of the other’s in the room, “Damian, get your dog off me.”

Damian shook his head, and leaned back in his seat, collecting his sketchbook in his hands. “I can’t do that, Drake. We’re in the middle of an experiment.”

Tim’s eyebrows pulled into a frown and he struggled a bit more, pushing at Titus’s weight, “What kind of experiment requires me being trapped under a two hundred pound dog?”

“Titus only weighs a hundred and forty pounds.” Damian corrected.

“Oh yes, only a hundred and forty, forgive the error.” Tim bit back.

Damian was fairly sure Drake’s words had not been an actual apology, but sarcasm, and he was preparing a retort in defense of his dog’s weight when Steph started laughing. The first one exploding from behind her hand in an attempt not to. Jason followed soon after, holding up his hand to Tim.

“Stay right there, Timmy. There’s a few people who need to see this in person.”

“No, Jason, don’t. Get back here and help!” Tim called after him as Jason left the room. When he was gone Tim turned his attention to Steph. “You’ll help me, won't you? Don’t you want to get revenge on Damian for eating your ice cream the other day?”

Steph shook her head. “He replaced it, and even if he hadn’t, this is too perfect to stop. Besides, I’m at a crucial stage in this manicure, any wrong moves and I’ll have to restart the whole thing.” Steph said wiggling her fingers for Tim to see.

“I’d like to think my life is a bit more important than some nails, but it is you I’m talking to.” Tim groaned and turned back to the dog. “Titus, you’re a good boy. Move please?”

Damian wasn’t sure why Drake hadn’t attempted to talk to the dog sooner, but he’d prepared Titus against the kind words that could come from his family. The dog lifted his head to look at Tim and shifted his weight, scooting closer to lick the boy’s face.

“No, that’s not what I meant!” Tim said wiping at his cheek.

He managed to ease his other arm out from under the dog and braced both hands against his side. “Come on, dog. Move.” Tim grunted as he pushed. Titus shifted a bit, scooting back from his hands but still staying planted on the boy’s chest.

“I’m disappointed in you, Drake. I thought you’d have managed better than this. Have you gone soft as Red Robin?” Damian asked.

Tim pushed the dog again. His success was limited by the fact that Titus was large and heavy. Tim’s thin arms had little effect against the bulk flopped against him.

 “No.” he said, “You try shoving a dog off your chest who doesn’t want to move. Even Bruce would have trouble in this situation.”

“What’s going on in here? Jason said there was a spectacle?”

All three of them looked up to see Dick walking in, Jason and Cass close behind him. Damian swallowed, Grayson didn’t always go along with his plans, this was one he’d probably disapprove of.

“Dick! Finally, someone with some sense. Get Titus off me.” Tim said, raising a hand to wave in Dick’s direction.

Dick stepped around the couch and looked down at Tim, a smile already playing on his face. “How did this happen?”

“Ask the Demon Brat. It’s all his fault.” Tim said, letting his arms flop back down as he turned to glare at Damian.

The boy shrugged and looked at Dick, “We were simply trying an experiment, that’s all. It’s not my fault if Drake cannot handle one well-mannered canine.”

“Well-mannered is not what I’d call him right now.” Tim grumbled.

Dick crossed his arms and looked down at the two, considering. Steph had gone back to examining her nails, Jason to his spot on the couch, and Cass was watching them all quietly, a small smile on her face. Damian looked back at his brother and prepared himself for Grayson’s inevitable demand to have Titus move, and then the ‘discussion’ on not tormenting his brothers (as if they didn’t torment him enough).

Instead his oldest brother grinned.

“I haven’t seen him do anything beyond what he’s been told, Tim. Have you tried asking Titus to move?”

Tim threw his hands up, “Seriously? Of course I tried that. I’ve tried everything, and none of you are any help. You're just condoning this because you think it’s cute, right?”

Now Damian turned to Dick, eyes wary, was that why his brother seemed so ok with this? The look on Grayson’s face was confirmation enough. Still, his fun wasn’t entirely ruined. He had successfully terrorized Drake with zero repercussions.

“Baby Bat’s attempts are always cute.” Cass said leaning over the couch to ruffle Damian’s hair.

He scowled and pushed her hand out of the way, but she’d already danced around to Tim.

“You know it’s all fun.” She smiled down at him, before crouching to pet Titus. “Good boy.” she said, scratching the dog’s ears. Her hands trailed the dog’s head, scratching at his scalp, then down his neck, before rubbing into his back.

“Move please.” she said, and Titus did.

He stood up, stepping carefully over Tim to press against Cass’s bent legs, head butting at her hands for more attention. She laughed, and ran a hand through the fur on his back again.

Damian glared down at him and muttered, “Traitor.” but it held little heat.

Tim jumped up and took the empty cushion on the couch. “Remind me not to fall asleep on the floor again.”

Jason put a hand on his shoulder, “It’d probably be better to worry about who you’re falling asleep around rather than on what surface.”

“Titus is an able climber.” Damian said, allowing a smug smile. It fell the moment he saw Cass’s hands catch on something in Titus’s fur. He’d forgotten the camera.

Cass picked it off the collar and gave Damian one wicked grin before hoisting it in the air. “Look.” It was all she had to say to get everyone’s attention.

“Damian.” Dick started, but Jason snatched the camera from Cass and advanced on Damian.

“This is why Titus was bugging me today wasn’t it?” He didn’t wait for an answer, instead he spun on the others. “The brat had Titus tripping me up the entire morning.”

“Not the entire morning.” Damian mumbled, though he should have if the endgame was him getting caught. He should have sent Titus after everyone, all day.

Tim was up now, taking the camera into his hands. “Did you record it?”

“Perhaps.” Damian admitted.

“And you recorded Titus sitting on me? No, we’re going to your room and I’m watching you delete it. You can save Jason’s for all I care, but you won’t blackmail me.”

Damian didn’t have time to say he hadn’t done it for blackmail, but for revenge, as Tim grabbed his sleeve. Dick stopped them both.

“Wait.” He said. “Damian, did you send Titus after me this morning too?”

Damian gulped, his brother looked genuinely hurt. His voice an almost whine.

“If I caused any great inconvenience, Grayson I didn’t mean to.” Damian started, but he let his apology trail off as his brother seemed to deflate, apparently believing he was immune to Damian’s antics.

“I thought you loved me, Dames.” Dick said.

Tim’s hand dropped from Damian’s arm as the boy chuckled. Jason and Steph were both concealing grins at the discomfort Damian was showing. Damian himself wasn’t sure what to do. He’d planned revenge and now Grayson seemed on the verge of tears.

“There’s just one thing for all this.” Dick sniffed, hand brushing across his face. “Revenge.” He said, grin replacing his frown the moment he charged at Damian. Jason took up the charge next, followed by Cass, Steph, and Tim.

Damian bolted, a smile on his own face, and knowing full well he’d be caught sooner than later by his siblings, but at least he’d give them something to chase.


End file.
